- By Isaac
- Van Wesep
Reacting v Reflecting: Can You Feel the Difference?
Scroll to the end for links to at-home practice activities.
We all know what it feels like to react quickly—whether firing off a hasty email or snapping at someone in frustration. Now, think about how much smoother things go when you pause, reflect, and then respond. This pause is a critical executive function skill for lifelong success. Controlling the urge to react quickly and taking time to reflect helps us navigate challenges thoughtfully rather than impulsively.
Children, especially at a young age, often act on impulse. However, teaching them to pause and reflect helps them manage their emotions, make thoughtful choices, and improve problem-solving. Developing these skills early can set them up for success in school and beyond.
A brain workout you can feel
To experience this firsthand, let’s take the Stroop Test together—it’s a fun way to understand what it means to reflect instead of react.
Step 1: read the words out loud to yourself in the box below.
Easy, right?
Now, let’s change the rule: for the words in the box below, don’t read the word. Instead, say the color of the text each word is written in.
That was harder, wasn’t it?
Your brain had to work to pause, reflect, and avoid the impulse to simply read the word. This is an example of reflecting, and not reacting. And it’s an example of your executive function in action!
It is important for children to exercise their developing skills through activities that foster creative play and social connection
Practice Can Strengthen Your (and your Kid's) Brain
Just like how doing the Stroop Test helps your brain practice these skills, children benefit from activities that challenge them to reflect rather than react. The more practice they get, the stronger their executive function becomes.
You and Your Kids Can Build EF Skills with Games Like These
Try these activities at home:
- Simon Says with a Twist: In this classic game, children must listen carefully and think before acting. Add a twist by occasionally giving tricky instructions or requiring reflection (e.g., “Simon says touch your nose, but don’t move your hands”). Encourage your child to pause before responding, helping them engage their self-control and focus.
- “Stop, Think, Act” Routine: Create a “Stop, Think, Act” routine for daily tasks, like getting ready for school or tidying up toys. Teach your child to first stop and take a deep breath, think about what needs to be done, and then act. This routine can help them slow down and reflect before they start tasks, fostering both planning and impulse control.
- Storytelling with Alternative Endings:
Pick a familiar story or a favorite bedtime book, and after reading it, ask your child to come up with different endings. Encourage them to think about how characters could have paused and made different choices in the story. This helps your child reflect on actions and consider multiple solutions, boosting their problem-solving skills.
More Resources
Want more ways to practice EF skills with your child? Try Some of these activities:
